Holy Smokes, Henry's 1 year old

I remember every detail of the day I gave birth to Henry. That first cry and that slimy first hug. I remember his first smile and his first laugh, held so tightly in my heart. I remember the first time he crawled, the first time he devoured a banana, the first time he gave me a big open mouth kiss leaving drool on my cheek. It all feels like it was just yesterday. This is has been the most incredible whirlwind year, full of some of the most wonderful moments I could ever imagine. 

And now, my little squish is a year old! He's a full blown toddler, climbing and standing, babbling and being stubborn, learning his animals and making messes. He's not a baby anymore. He eats like a beast, and is absolutely present in every moment teaching us to be excited about the little things in life. 

So because I'm a first time mom, my son is amazing, and I love a good excuse to eat cake and have people over, Henry had a fun little birthday party last weekend. He doesnt have any 1 year old friends yet, so we invited a bunch of ours over. I did my best at being crafty and made the decorations, and have the hot glue gun burns to show for it. 

 He ate cake. Lots of it. A good time was had by all. I'm so proud of the little boy he has become, so excited for the adventures we have ahead of us, and a little sad for the baby moments that have passed. 

Hoping for hundreds more afternoon naps that I can sneakily peak in at him. 

To nap, or not to nap. That is the plea.

My kid is basically a no-nonsense nap fighter. He means business. He does not want to nap and he makes sure you know it. He may be exhausted, rubbing his beautiful little eyes, yawning and being generally fussy, but don't let that fool you, he does not want to nap. Logic escapes me, or better yet, escapes Henry, as I wonder why, if he is so tired, he refuses to nap. I try to reason with him, "If you take a nap and get some rest you will feel so much better, and we can play and read and eat and have a great time." 

He takes nothing I say seriously. 

So I write this while watching him on the baby monitor, the sweetest little thing starting to stir after just a half hour of rest. A half hour asleep after what was a 90 minute battle to get him to sleep. I guess I shouldn't say battle when it really was just hanging out with my awesome kid. We bounced and rocked and walked around. We hummed and shushed and sang a song. We laid together and we nursed. Nothing calmed his crying and fighting. Until finally he just went calm. He lay against me in the rocking chair with his eyes wide open, but completely still and calm. My sweet sweet boy. And eventually, time took it's toll and he closed his eyes and went to sleep. 

And then he woke up, 30 quick minutes later. Sigh...

We are very lucky to have such an easy baby. We've known this from day 1. And we hear it quite regularly from people. "He is such a happy baby." "I've never seen such a calm baby just sit there like that." And it's true, we are able to go out to restaurants to eat, we've gone to plenty of Mommy & Me movie showings, we go for walks and run errands. And he is seriously a great little dude, and we love being able to take him out with us. 

All that being said, he still hates napping. 

I'll never understand.

What I would do for a nap...

It's this funny cycle we go through. Fighting naps as infants and toddlers, taking naps again in kindergarten, staying up late once we hit our teen years, taking naps daily in college, no time for naps once you have a job and responsibilities and stuff, and then yearning for naps once you have a child. Sleep. 

I will NEVER EVER take it for granted. 

I know some people think it's a waste of time to sleep more than six hours, and yes, maybe I could get more done if I stayed up super late or got up super early, but I am generally a more tolerable human being if I've gotten some decent sleep.

So for the sake of my family...I will sleep whenever I get the opportunity. 

Henry Benjamin's Birthday

 Let’s start with the end in mind. Henry Benjamin was born July 21^st, though coming nearly two weeks before his due date, he arrived at a healthy 7lbs 14oz and 20 ¾” long.

At my 37 week appointment, my doctor examined me and found that I was 3cm dialated. I was of course surprised, as I had yet to feel any contractions of any kind throughout the pregnancy. A week later at my 38 week appointment, I was at 5cm dialated, again without feeling any contractions. My doctor felt certain she would see us at the hospital before my next appointment. And she was right!

Friday, at about 6:00pm I started feeling pain in my back. I initially dismissed it as back spasms, because I had always heard contraction felt like bad menstrual cramps, but these pains were all in my lower back. At about 6:30pm James insisted I start keeping track of the pains, how long they lasted and how far apart they were. By 7:15pm we were headed to the hospital! During the entire drive the back pains, which I now know were contractions, were 2.5 minutes apart and lasting about 40 seconds. They were pretty intense, but we stayed in good spirits, singing and dancing in the car. We arrived at the hospital, by 8:15pm and after being examined, I was already at 7cm dialated. They were all very surprised I was still on my feet. I guess I got lucky!

After the initial exams, and procedures we got the epidural started. It took 3 attempts to get it placed correctly – ouch! But it was amazing how I no longer felt contractions, oh sweet relief…for the time being that was. A couple of hours later I was at 9cm dialated, they broke my water, but the baby was still too high so we had to wait. Once the water broke, the most bizarre thing happened. I started feeling the contractions – in all of their intensity – in my right butt cheek. It was so strange (and painful). It turns out the baby must have been on my sciatica nerve. There was nothing they could do, the epidural had no effect and I had to experience every contraction – through my right butt cheek. After an hour of practice pushing,the baby was now low enough for my doctor to come and get this baby delivered! At 2am I then had to push for nearly 2 hours! It was exhausting, and incredibly daunting.

The second the baby was out and they laid him on my stomach I balled, I heard his first cry and I screamed. I was overwhelmed with love and relief and amazement. Here was our baby. Here was the crazy little dude that was stirring inside of me not long ago. He was real, and I could see him and feel him. It is an absolutely indescribable feeling.

There we were, after, meeting Henry Benjamin for the first time. He came out as an incredibly beautiful, healthy, strong baby and we couldn’t be more grateful! We spent two days in the hospital and couldn’t wait to head home. 

I could not have gotten through this pregnancy without my husband. The most amazing man on this planet, who with all of his love and support and certainty and vision, kept me sane, healthy, and positive. He is my bestfriend and was the greatest partner during labor and delivery, and is already a wonderful dad. 

So here we are, The Coopers, with our own little family. 

As most new parents can attest to, we are seeing all of the funny little quirks that our little dude has to offer, our iphones are already full of pictures of him, and we are completely in love.

Oh yeah..forgot to mention..there's a baby in my belly.

'Tis so. 

The Coops are procreating, and a powerful and super creation we expect it to be. Now, at nearly 17 weeks along, the guilt and empty hole of bloglessness has set in. I'll give you the short of the long, or at least I'll attempt to do so as I encapsulate the new, crazy, challenging, and amazing bits of the adventure thus far.

We found out in late November, well I found out and absolutely melted with excitement when sharing with the Mr., that we would be welcoming a baby into our lives this summer. And so it began, the endless thoughts, dreams, lists, ideas, wonders of what was to come...for the rest of our lives. 

At week 5 my personal living hell began. But, with the most amazing husband and family to support me in positive thoughts, I was constantly reminded, through the puking and misery, that this meant it was a strong pregnancy. Extra hormones helping baby to grow. 

DiRuscio's on Christmas

Christmas with Mr Coop

Eatin' Candy Hike

Sugar Bowl at Super Dome NOLA

I got a brief and unexpected ten day relief from the sickness from Christmas Eve through the New Year, allowing me to enjoy a hike with friends, the holidays with the family, our first doctor appointment hearing the strong heartbeat of our little monkey, and our trip to New Orleans for the Sugar Bowl.

 And suddenly it returned, though all my hopes were that it had forever passed. Another 5 weeks of throwing up, exhaustion, and overall ickyness. Waiting for that day everyone talked about, where everything was suddenly better, while also fearing it would NEVER go away. And then it happened...the day before I was 14 weeks along. I no longer wanted to stay in bed all day. I no longer dreaded eating. I no longer threw up. What?! It had passed, it was fantastic. 

And well, that pretty much brings us to now. I am about 17 weeks along, I haven't thrown up in three weeks, I have a little bit more energy, and I have just gotten back to my pre-pregnancy weight (lost a bit in the first trimester with all the sickness). Oh yeah, and at our last appointment we found out that we are having a boy! Pretty sweet deal, we are over the moon excited and already love our little dude so much. 

I have a slight baby bump, but it's the at the awkward cant-tell-if-it's-a-pouch-or-baby-bump phase, so I try to do that pregnant lady thing where I rest my hand on it every once in a while to signify that it's my baby in there, not my lunch. Because I'm neurotic. Or ridiculous for even caring that I look slightly bloated. Even though I know that I am growing a freaking human being in my body! It's absolutely mind blowing, and strange, and amazing. 

Way too many stories to share, or things I've experienced. Here's just a few new realities I am faced with. 

1. "Oops I just peed a little" is no longer a joke to express how hard you just laughed. No, it's life. Real life. A sneeze, cough, or laugh does it. That along with having to pee every 30 minutes leaves me with a new awareness of where the nearest bathroom is at all times.

2. I would not be alive if it weren't for my awesome husband. My first trimester left me in bed ALL day, except when my head was in the toilet. I was weak, tired, sick, and generally an absolute mess. He would bring me food, he would go to work, he would wash dishes, he wouldn't judge me for not showering for days on end, he didnt get grossed out when I threw up into plastic bags while we were in the car - every time, he listened when I had emotional breakdowns. I am forever grateful for his patience, strength, and power to make me laugh through the tears and smile through the struggle. Couldn't have a better partner in life, seriously amazed by this man.

3. There is no longer any space in my mind for thoughts other than the baby's clothes, the baby's nursery, the baby's health, the baby's arrival, all the fun things we have planned to do with our baby, etc, etc. We talk to my stomach to the baby. He seriously is already the center of our world. It's crazy the instincts that kick in and the mushy love stuff that inevitably just appears when you have a baby on the way. 

8.1.12